I made peace with your death

He had soft uncalloused hands for someone his age. He was 89 with the childish innocence of an 8 year old, and the spontaneity of a toddler who did not hesitate before letting out a chuckle.
My last memory with him is of me sitting beside him while he lay in bed, with his eyes closed, while I gently stroked his hands, attempting to reassure him that the suffering would be over soon, wondering whether or not I truly believed that. Both of us, him and I, needed the faith to believe that he'd be better soon, be able to remember faces of his friends and peers, people that he'd met every day, for the past four scores of his life.

His memory was starting to fade, but, not his instinct. He couldn't remember names of his visitors, but, he had a smile across his face when his son walked in. His saviour was here. He trusted the eyes of his son, forever strong and caring. He believed that love could heal his pain. What he couldn't see was the fading faith in his son’s eyes. The man who had raised him to be the man he was, was slowly slipping away, in front of him..  He could do nothing to hold him back. He stood there numbed by the helplessness. However, the faith still prevailed.

He's in a better place today. And, as dreadful was the experience to see him lie still in front of me, I made peace with his death. I saw his calm face and his wrinkled hands and I was convinced that his soul is smiling now, realizing he had left the world a loved man.

I miss you every day. I miss your laughter and your adoring smile. I miss the colour of your eyes. I miss your beautiful handwriting and your love for literature. I miss you.

But, you can rest now, as we have made peace with your death.

Comments

  1. lady luckFebruary 20, 2015 at 6:29 AM

    It means so much to you when you make peace with the turn of events.. Not just to you, but also to the person you so fondly forever remember.

    Kudos girl in beige shorts for using such beautiful words for something this profound. :)

    -Kundu

    ReplyDelete
  2. The girl in the beige shortsFebruary 20, 2015 at 6:31 AM

    :) Thank you, Lady luck! :*

    ReplyDelete
  3. UnknownFebruary 20, 2015 at 1:58 PM

    We share the love for old people and that's what I love about this post.

    ReplyDelete
  4. UnknownFebruary 21, 2015 at 6:47 AM

    This is going nostalgic
    I too felt the same for my Naanu (grandpa)
    just like dis lady of ur story
    I miss u naanu ....

    ReplyDelete
  5. UnknownFebruary 21, 2015 at 6:47 AM

    This is going nostalgic
    I too felt the same for my Naanu (grandpa)
    just like dis lady of ur story
    I miss u naanu ....

    ReplyDelete
  6. dramaprincessFebruary 22, 2015 at 11:36 AM

    He is definitely in a better place now love..and every word put by you was genuinely felt..he is for sure proyd of you..and I love you and sorry for the late comment.

    ReplyDelete

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